Zen Day 32: Politics

Anybody who can be a good pretender, a hypocrite, will become your leader politically, will become your priest religiously. All that he needs is hypocrisy, all that he needs is cunningness, all that he needs is a facade to hide behind. Your politicians live double lives, your priests live double lives–one from the front door, the other from the back door. And the back-door life is their real life. Those front-door smiles are just false, those faces looking so innocent are just cultivated. If you want to see the reality of the politician you will have to see him from his back door. There he is in his nudity, as he is, and so is the priest. These two kinds of cunning people have dominated humanity. And they found out very early on that if you want to dominate humanity, make it weak, make it feel guilty, make it feel unworthy. Destroy its dignity, take all glory away from it, humiliate it. And they have found such subtle ways of humiliation that they don’t come in the picture at all; they leave it to you to humiliate yourself, to destroy yourself. They have taught you a kind of slow suicide.

Osho The White Lotus Chapter 10

Do you recognize this man? All but the most innocent and sincere of us have a politician lurking somewhere in our minds. In fact, the mind is political. Its very nature is to plan and scheme and try to manipulate situations and people so that it can get what it wants. Here, the mind is represented by the snake, covered with clouds and “speaking with a forked tongue”. But the important thing to realize about this card is that both faces are false. The sweet, innocent, “trust me” face is a mask, and the evil, toxic, “I’ll have my way with you” face is a mask, too. Politicians don’t have real faces. The whole game is a lie. Take a good look at yourself to see if you have been playing this game. What you see might be painful, but not as painful as continuing to play. It doesn’t serve anybody’s interest in the end, least of all yours. Whatever you might achieve in this way will just turn to dust in your hands.

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Reading this card’s commentary this morning, my knee-jerk reaction was, “Phew! That’s totally not me.  I don’t behave that way.”  And, on some level – if I want to be super picky about it – that’s true as I’m pretty sure that I’m not some duplicitous wretch.  But, if I force myself to be honest and not ridiculously literal, isn’t it much easier to see the two sides that war between my words and actions?  What if, on occasion, I add intention in the mix?  Are these always aligned for the greatest good and the utmost transparent reasons?

If I’m honest about it, then I have to say no.

From trivial arguments with BD where my passive aggressive instinct kicks in to gossip sessions with girlfriends to workplace politics, I can pinpoint any number of times where my words, actions, and intent are totally out of whack and I am not acting with consciousness, compassion, or, quite simply, an ounce of common sense.

Should I strive to never be that person ever again?  Probably not a realistic goal.  That’s what BD would call a classic “set up,” as in setting yourself up for failure.  Should I strive to be more conscious more of the time?  Definitely doable.

Lesson of the Day: conscious, compassionate living = words + actions + intent

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It is amazing to me how the Universe works – this week has been literally zooming by.  I can’t tell you the last time I had a week go by so quickly.  It has been a huge blessing in dealing with my father as the constant distractions keep me from becoming bogged down for too long at any one stretch.  How incredibly blessed I feel to have this seeming subconscious undercurrent of positive energy just finding its way to our corner of the universe right when we need it most?  (Answer: really freakin’ lucky!)

I have felt a peace about my maybe babies that I really was not expecting.  I thought that this week would be the most difficult of this entire process, but I have this wonderful sense of completion and – to use my new favorite word from yesterday’s card – facticity about the circumstances.  I am excited about tomorrow morning, which is when I do the blood test to determine if there’s a “chemical” pregnancy – I don’t want guess about what the outcome will be, but I have a very positive feeling, whatever that means.

My step-father sent me a really touching text message yesterday morning, in which he unwittingly referred to my “maybe baby” – this immediately made me think of that Buddy Holly song, “Maybe Baby,” and made me smile all day long.  My blobs are now my maybe babies.

Happy Thursday.

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